Tag: problem solving

Sitting at the Water Hole

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I sit at the water hole and let my thoughts come to me.

Sometimes, I feel like my thoughts are chasing me and they keep finding me. Gayathri Narayanan, my meditation teacher, encouraged us to ‘sit at the water hole’ and wait for our thoughts to come to us. She said that her teacher, Gil Fronsdal, talked about it in terms of being a wildlife photographer. You could either follow the footprints and chase the wildlife around their territory or you could simply sit at the water hole knowing all animals will eventually need to drink. The first helpful step for me is to stop chasing my thoughts and stop letting them chase me. I sit at the water hole and let them come to me.

As my thoughts come to me, I label them. Is it useful? Is it pleasant? Unpleasant? Neutral? These questions have been helpful to me as I navigate times in my life that consume my thoughts.

Balancing is a Series of Falls

What would it look like to view falling as a part of balancing, mistakes as a part of learning and growing, and a necessary means to an end?

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Balancing is a series of falls. My yoga teacher said something about how balancing is just the process of falling in and out over and over again. While I wobbled slowly in tree pose, I had a light bulb moment. Balancing is just a series of falling in and out. Someone rarely balances right into a tree pose. You need to ground yourself, ready your limbs, fall in and out of balance, practice a lot, and reflect

When I taught at an independent school in Marin County California, there was a class called Energy Time, a sort of combo of meditation and Aikido. At that time, an experienced and skilled teacher taught us to fall and get back up.

Leveraging Your Strengths

Leverage your strengths to discover your full potential.

Photo by LOGAN WEAVER | @LGNWVR on Unsplash

Leverage your strengths to discover your full potential. When I was new to teaching, I used to think of strengths and weaknesses as two different things on opposite sides and disconnected from one another. Your strengths were in one silo and your weaknesses in another. As I gained more experience in life and as a teacher, I realized that our strengths can be used to leverage our areas of growth. Strengths and areas of growth are connected. This helped me immensely as a teacher of young children. Working with a student’s strengths builds confidence,  a clear understanding of how they learn best, and a way to influence their areas of growth.

As a student this summer these ideas were reinforced when I completed my training as a Clifton Strengths Finder Coach. Before the course, I took the Clifton Strengths Assessment and learned about my top 10 strengths in depth.

Slow Down and Do More

Slow down and do more.

Photo by LOGAN WEAVER | @LGNWVR on Unsplash

Slow down and do more. You might think these two things don’t belong together. How do you work slower and do more? Would that work? I think so! 

As a younger parent working full time, I felt like I had to be rushing around all the time. I was often trying to do more than one thing at a time. Of course, now we all know there is no such thing as multitasking. Rather, you are just switching from one task to another and ultimately not doing any of it very well or faster. 

The first time I practiced mindfulness, I was trying to focus on one task with all my senses. I decided to focus on scrambling my eggs in the morning before work. I used all my senses and scrambled the eggs. Normally, I would try to check emails, make lunch, or something else on my to-do list while I made breakfast.

From Stillness to Clarity

Stillness can lead to clarity.

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Stillness can lead to clarity. My yoga teacher mentioned stillness and clarity as he encouraged us to hold a pose. The more I thought about this idea, I realized that you can reach stillness in many ways, actually being physically still is just one of them. 

I often think of my best ideas or solutions, when my mind is still but maybe not my body. Stillness can be interpreted in many ways. I recently saw a funny advertisement for a mattress where a person wakes up from a good night’s rest and exclaims, “I know where my passport is!” I don’t know if a good mattress or one night’s sleep can bring you this much clarity but I have experienced moments of clarity when I feel stillness. 

Be still. Stillness reveals the secrets of eternity

Lao Tzu

I define stillness as more than being physically still.

Pay Attention to Failure

What is failure telling you?

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What if we pay attention to failure, really think about what it is trying to teach us, and make future decisions based on our past failures? We can approach failure in many ways. We can decide to ignore our failures and move along. We can feel shame about them and not address them. There are so many ways to deal with failure. We could think about each failure and wonder what it can teach us. What is a failure trying to tell you? As my yoga teacher would say…Falling out of a position is an invitation to try again. That is how I am trying to embrace failure nowadays. Failure is an invitation to get back in and learn from it.

When I was just out of college, I moved to New York City and started my job search. I went on job interview after interview in the NYC publishing world.

Composting Your Thoughts

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Do you ever feel like your mind is buzzing with thought after thought? This happens to me often. I used to think it would help to get rid of or suppress the thoughts, then I could be mindful and focused. I was wrong! That did not work! I recently learned about composting thoughts as a strategy to deal with the sometimes constant unhelpful rumination in my mind.

First, I notice when I am having a stream of thoughts. Then, as my meditation teacher taught me, I visualize each thought as a green bean in a colander. As each thought comes up, I take a green bean out of the colander and sort it. Helpful thoughts, crisp and firm beans, go in the bowl and unhelpful thoughts, mushy and discolored, go in the compost bucket.

At first, I thought I was throwing out the unhelpful thoughts but then I thought about how compost turns into nutrient-rich soil, eventually.

Take What Works, Leave the Rest

Do you hear the opportunity in this phrase?

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Take what works and leave the rest. I have heard this expression a few times in various settings. At first, I thought, is this what you say when you don’t feel like completing something? When I was growing up in an immigrant family that came to the U.S. in the early 1970s, my dad would often hold us captive for his many lectures on life, hard work, and success. One of his frequent lines to us, especially if we complained about something school-related, was, “90% of life is doing what you don’t want to do.” So basically, get over it and just do it! Recently, my 24-year-old son was complaining about something at work and he said, “I know what you always say, 80 % of life is doing what you don’t want to do.” Hmmm. That did not sound like positive parenting when I heard it said back to me that way.